LUST IN MARRIAGE

DEALING WITH LUST IN MARRIAGE

Lust can be defined as an intense or unrestrained sexual desire or craving. It involves a strong, often selfish, and objectifying longing for sexual gratification outside the appropriate context. Lust focuses primarily on the physical aspect of attraction and seeks immediate sexual fulfillment without regard for emotional connection or the well-being of others.

In a broader sense, lust can also refer to an excessive or unrestrained desire for anything, not just sexual desires. It can encompass a strong craving for power, money, possessions, or other worldly pleasures.

In the context of relationships and marriage, lust becomes problematic when it goes beyond healthy sexual desire within the committed boundaries of marriage and leads to objectification, infidelity, or disregard for the well-being of one’s partner. In contrast, love, which is often contrasted with lust, involves a selfless, sacrificial, and unconditional concern for the well-being of others. Love seeks to build an intimate and meaningful connection that goes beyond physical attraction and focuses on emotional, spiritual, and relational bonding. It’s important to note that experiencing sexual desire or attraction within the context of marriage is natural and healthy. Lust becomes an issue when it becomes the dominant force in a relationship, causing harm to oneself or others and undermining the commitment and intimacy within the marriage.

Dealing with lust within marriage is a common challenge that many couples face. The Bible provides guidance on how to address and overcome lust in the context of a marital relationship. Here are a few principles and Bible references that can be helpful:

1. Cultivate a strong marital bond: Investing in a healthy and intimate relationship with your spouse is essential. The Song of Solomon (specifically chapters 1-8) celebrates the beauty and importance of romantic love within marriage. By nurturing emotional intimacy, open communication, and deepening the connection with your spouse, you can strengthen your commitment to each other and reduce the temptations of lust.
2. Practice self-control: The Bible repeatedly emphasizes the importance of self-control in various areas of life, including sexual desires. Galatians 5:22-23 mentions self-control as a fruit of the Spirit. By relying on God’s strength and seeking the Holy Spirit’s guidance, you can exercise self-control over lustful thoughts and desires.
3. Set boundaries: Establishing healthy boundaries within your marriage is crucial for maintaining purity and avoiding situations that may lead to lustful thoughts or actions. The apostle Paul encourages believers to flee from sexual immorality in 1 Corinthians 6:18 and to avoid even the appearance of evil in 1 Thessalonians 5:22. Discuss and establish clear boundaries with your spouse, respecting each other’s limits and committing to honoring them.
4. Renew your mind: Romans 12:2 encourages believers to renew their minds and transform their thinking. In the context of lust, it involves actively replacing impure thoughts with positive and godly thoughts. Regularly reading and meditating on the Scriptures, engaging in prayer, and seeking accountability and support from other believers can help in renewing your mind and redirecting your thoughts.

5. Seek God’s help: Recognize that overcoming lust is not solely reliant on your own

efforts but requires God’s help. Philippians 4:13 reminds believers that they can

do all things through Christ who strengthens them. Pray for God’s guidance,

strength, and grace to overcome lustful temptations within your marriage.

Open communication, honesty, and seeking professional help when needed are also important in addressing issues of lust within marriage. It’s crucial to approach the topic with compassion, understanding, and a commitment to support one another on the journey towards purity and a thriving marital relationship.